Hidden Hours Read online

  Despite Savannah’s pleas to try out some of the rides, Eleanor hurries them towards the ice rink, determined to follow Susan’s instructions and not give her aunt any more reason to dislike her. When her phone rings in her pocket she pulls it out and sees an unknown number. She hesitates, then answers, ‘Hello?’

  ‘Hi Eleanor, it’s Will.’

  It takes her a few moments to realise it’s Will from work, and he must sense her uncertainty, because he quickly adds, ‘Will Clayton.’

  His unfamiliar deep voice causes butterflies in her stomach. ‘Oh, hi.’

  ‘I just wanted to check you were all right – you left the office so quickly yesterday.’

  ‘How did you get my number?’ She doesn’t mean to sound so suspicious, but the words are out before she can stop them.

  ‘Priscilla gave it to me. Look, is there any way I can meet you today? I’d like to talk to you.’

  His tone is intensifying her unease. She looks around. ‘I’m at the ice skating rink in Hyde Park.’

  ‘Oh, the Winter Wonderland one?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Can you wait there? It’ll take me about half an hour to get to you.’

  ‘Okay.’

  ‘Thanks, Eleanor – see you then.’

  When the conversation is over, Eleanor cannot focus on her surroundings. She tries to bring herself back to the moment, saying an over-the-top ‘Wow!’ as they reach the bandstand and see the skaters, everyone wrapped up warmly in thick coats and scarves and hats. She sniffs and rubs her nose, already red and cold.

  ‘Come on!’ Savannah waves them forward to the small tent where they can hire skates. Ten minutes later, they all walk awkwardly towards the ice. Eleanor’s fears of falling on the hard surface are at least a temporary diversion from Will’s impending appearance. Savannah holds her arm while they step on to the rink, but to her surprise Naeve glides away as though she has done this many times before. Eleanor can’t catch sight of her expression until she’s coming back towards them, but when she does, she sees her cousin is stony-faced, as though this endless skating in circles is some kind of mission she’s determined to complete.

  Eleanor hasn’t skated since she was a child. She steps gingerly forward, holding on to the rail at the rink’s perimeter. Behind her, Savannah lets go, studying her feet as she works on her balance, then calling out ‘Naeve!’ and holding out a hand. On her next circuit, Naeve slows down and grabs Savannah’s hand, pulling her along. Savannah turns around and beams at Eleanor, and Eleanor wonders if it’s the skating she enjoys or being looked after, rather than ignored, by her big sister.

  As Eleanor moves slowly around the rink, she glances either side of her, studying faces, her nerves buzzing. What on earth can Will have to say that he needs to come and find her like this? Is it connected to Arabella? Does he know something that might relieve her fears? Or could he be coming to confront her?

  You are not responsible, she says to herself, under her breath. You couldn’t be. But in her mind’s eye, a body spins slowly on a rope, turning to face her.

  She clutches the rail harder, watching her exhalations vanish in the air, willing the image away with each one. She hasn’t felt this unsteady for a long time. She’s learned from bitter experience that the memories get stronger if she fights them; she has to feign nonchalance as her thoughts taunt her with horrors, and just breathe until they quieten.

  Suddenly a tall figure is beside her and then in front of her, his skates grinding against the ice as he comes to a halt.

  ‘Hey, Eleanor,’ Will catches her expression, ‘are you okay?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ she says shyly. He is wearing dark jeans, a padded red jacket and a grey beanie that highlights his angled cheekbones and sharp, shadowed jawline. His nose is red from the cold, but out here in the stark daylight she can’t avoid noticing how penetrating his deep brown eyes are. He doesn’t look much older than her – he can’t be much more than mid twenties. How can he already be the Art Director for a major company, when she is still figuring out her path in life?

  ‘It’s a good day for skating,’ he says, gesturing towards the clear skies, each of the breaths between his words momentarily visible in the cold air. ‘I’m glad you’re here – I needed to do something to clear my head.’

  Eleanor nods. ‘Me too. Did you know Arabella well?’

  He looks away and she can see him struggling to compose himself. ‘Yes, I did. She was a good friend of mine – we’ve worked together for five years.’ He stares at a spot somewhere over her shoulder. His eyes grow moist and there’s a nerve twitching in his jaw. ‘I still can’t believe it – it’s unreal, isn’t it? I keep waiting to wake up.’

  Will is about to say more when Savannah shouts ‘Eleanor!’ and waves as they fly past her.

  Will watches them go. ‘Are they Susan’s girls?’ he asks.

  ‘Yes.’

  Will stares after them, while Eleanor begins to fidget, feeling the cold engulf her now she has stopped moving.

  ‘So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?’

  Will turns to her and hesitates, biting his lip. His gaze is a spotlight, but she’s not sure what he’s searching for. ‘Thursday night, of course. I don’t quite know where to start. Do you remember anything of what happened?’

  He looks so solemn. What does he know? And what has she done? ‘I . . . I’m not sure. Why do you ask?’ she stammers.

  ‘Well, there’s no easy way to say this, Eleanor. We had to pull you off the bridge. You were climbing over it. You were – well, I don’t mean to be blunt but you were rambling, completely incoherent. I really thought you were going to jump.’

  Eleanor forgets she has the skates on and takes an automatic step backwards, losing her balance. She flails and Will is there quickly, his hand on her elbow, steadying her.

  ‘The bridge? I don’t understand.’

  He studies her for a moment. ‘You really don’t remember anything?’

  ‘No, no. I don’t remember being outside. The last thing I can recall is seeing Arabella slap Nathan, at the party. Unless I’ve made that up?’

  ‘No, that was real, all right – I saw it myself.’ Will grimaces. ‘And then she ran out and you and I followed. Arabella was crying and you were frantic. I chased you both down to the bridge, to make sure you were all right, but Arabella stopped and yelled at us and then took off, sprinting further ahead. I went after her and had just caught her up when she spotted you and began shouting again. I had no idea you’d stopped, but you were twenty metres behind us, climbing over the railing in the pouring rain. A woman passing by was already trying to grab on to your legs. We ran to you and managed to wrestle you back with a couple of other people helping out. And then you just collapsed to the ground, and sobbed and sobbed.’ He puts a hand on her arm, staring so intently that she cannot help but blush. ‘You scared the crap out of me, Eleanor.’

  ‘Oh god, oh god.’ Eleanor turns away to hide her face. Why on earth had she done that? It must have been the drugs, but the flashback to her teenage years is immediate and painful. ‘I don’t remember anything. And what about Arabella? What happened next? There’s such a horrible gap in my memories . . . Please tell me what you know.’

  Will holds onto her arm as they move over to the side, then leans on the railing next to her. ‘Arabella was fine at that point. When she was helping to pull you off the bridge I realised she was either drunk or high, because – because she couldn’t stop laughing. I was furious with her, and I told her to come with us – but she wouldn’t. She said she needed to make a phone call, so she stayed behind.’

  Eleanor stares at the glittering white ice, not wanting to catch Will’s eye. ‘And was that the last time you saw her?’ she says softly.

  ‘No. She came back to The Atlantic a little while later. The party was beginning to break up, and I’d laid you on a sofa in the reception area. You seemed to be falling asleep, so I’d gone to see if I could find someone to help get you home.’ />
  Eleanor sags back against the railing. ‘Oh, thank god. I was worried I’d been wandering around London on my own, completely out of it.’

  ‘Hang on,’ Will looks solemn. ‘That’s not all of it. When I came back to find you, Arabella was with you. She was crying and holding your hand, talking to you, even though you still looked half-asleep. Then Judith Lyle came past and spotted Arabella, said Nathan was looking for her. Judith seemed really worried, she said Nathan was livid about being slapped like that in front of everyone. She suggested Arabella go somewhere else, and Arabella didn’t need telling twice, she just ran out again. I went after her, followed her down to the Embankment. I tried to tell her I would make sure she got home safely, stay with her if she wanted, but she shook me off. She was in a really weird mood – half-euphoric, half-agitated, but I couldn’t persuade her to come with me, so eventually I just left her there, by the Embankment.’ He pauses, and his eyes fill with tears. ‘If I hadn’t given up, perhaps she would still be alive.’ He takes a slow, deep breath and Eleanor sees his jaw tighten. ‘I don’t mean to burden you with that on top of everything else. I just needed to check on you today, because I’m still trying to piece together what happened.’

  ‘So, did you go home after that?’

  Will looks dejected. ‘Yes, I did – but first I went back for you, only to find out you’d disappeared. The staff were really unhelpful. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to abandon you. I can’t tell you how relieved I was to see you at work. I was planning to talk to you about it yesterday, but you’d gone again before I could.’

  Eleanor is staring at him, trying to absorb what he is saying. ‘So, how did I get home after the party?’

  ‘I have no idea.’

  Eleanor turns away from him and stares across the park, trying to process this. A few yards away a toddler is running to keep up with his parents and drops his candyfloss, immediately letting out a howl of anguish. His mother hurries back and kneels down next to him, plucking bits of grass from the spun sugar while talking to her son, giving him back the white cloud on a stick, kissing him on the cheek, making him giggle.

  Eleanor finds she is crying. She pushes the tears away angrily.

  ‘Eleanor? I feel terrible upsetting you like this. Can I do anything to help?’

  Reluctantly, she turns around to see Will still watching her.

  ‘No, I don’t think so. I’m embarrassed that I caused you so much stress. I don’t remember anything. I’d taken something – some sort of drug.’

  ‘What do you mean, “some sort of drug”?’

  Eleanor catches his eye and sends a silent plea for understanding. ‘Arabella put something in my drink, and I have no idea what it was. I don’t think she meant any harm, she just wanted us both to enjoy the party. She put the same thing in her drink too.’

  Will looks up at the sky for a moment, and it’s clear his focus is far away from the ice rink. Then he shakes his head and comes back to her. ‘That doesn’t surprise me. There’s plenty of gossip in the office about Arabella’s social habits, and I’ve seen her on a high before. It might have been roofies – I have friends who think they go well with cocaine, not that I’ve experienced it.’

  Eleanor gasps. ‘You mean Rohypnol?’

  ‘Yes – that would explain why you can’t remember much. Perhaps you were hallucinating on the bridge. You kept saying the same thing over and over. Forgive me. Forgive me. But you weren’t looking at me – it was like you were looking over my shoulder.’

  Despite the cold, every inch of Eleanor’s body is burning, but she forces herself to stand straighter, unflinching. If she had been hallucinating, she knows who she saw. It might be the first time she’d been drugged, but it’s not the first time she’s tried to harm herself to escape her visions of him.

  If her mother found out about any of this, she would take the twenty-hour flight to London immediately, and she wouldn’t leave until Eleanor was with her. But Eleanor couldn’t go back to that stultifying house, to the person who had witnessed the worst of her. This was to be her fresh start, yet it is already going horribly wrong.

  An awful thought occurs to her. ‘Oh no, did my aunt see what I was like at the party?’ If Susan had witnessed anything of this behaviour, maybe her mother already knew.

  ‘No, Susan never stays at a party for the whole evening. I’m sure as soon as the boat docked she disappeared. It’s not the done thing for the CEO to dance the night away with her minions.’

  The image of her aunt letting loose on the dance floor comes unbidden, distracting Eleanor for a moment, and she even lets slip a small smile. But then Will adds, ‘She may have heard something by now, though. A few people saw you chase Arabella outside, and for some of them it may have been the last time they ever saw Arabella.’

  Eleanor nods. Her legs feel too wobbly to take the whole weight of her, and she clutches the railing. Will is beside her instantly.

  ‘It’ll be okay, Eleanor,’ he says, his expression kind. ‘The police are talking to everyone – just tell them what you know. That’s all you can do.’

  He smiles reassuringly at her, and she relaxes just a little. She hadn’t realised how lonely she had felt since arriving in London, but it’s so good to have a friendly face to talk to outside of the family. She really wants to trust him. Her heart begins to thud. The ring is still in her bag, and the revelation is on the tip of her tongue. But she hesitates. Will is the only person showing her any sympathy right now, and she doesn’t know if she can bear the suspicion in his eyes if she tells him.

  Before she can say anything, Will speaks again. ‘I’m not sure what’s going to happen at work now, but don’t trust Nathan. He’s despicable – he’s treated Arabella so badly for so long. If she did jump into the Thames, no one would be surprised. And remember that Nathan and Susan have a long history – if she’s forced to make a choice, she may well take his side.’

  ‘Really? What do you mean?’

  ‘Ernie Lane – Nathan’s dad – is Susan’s mentor. Ernie owns the company – he founded it, and gave Susan the reins. Nathan always fawns over Susan – there’s a rumour he tried to persuade her to date him before she married your uncle, but the story goes that she wasn’t interested. Ernie obviously realised Nathan could be difficult, and didn’t want him in charge of the company he built, so Susan is there to keep him in check. It’s a tough job, and while she might not be completely loyal to Nathan, she’s fiercely loyal to Ernie. Arabella didn’t make Susan’s life easy either – she seemed quite jealous of Susan, she often sniped about her, and I’m sure Susan felt the friction.’

  Eleanor tries to take in all this information. Would her aunt really stay loyal to Nathan if she were aware of his behaviour? In the few weeks Eleanor has been at Parker & Lane she has already seen flashes of Nathan’s volatility. He had once raged at her for giving him the wrong files for a meeting, shouting so the whole office could hear, leaving her stunned. He had no qualms about yelling at people on the phone either, although he usually closed his office door, which at least dulled the noise. She had witnessed the way people approached his room, tense and wary, and the way their shoulders sagged in relief as they left. She had quickly begun to feel that way herself, grateful that he spent so much of his day in meetings.

  And since Nathan was so disagreeable at work, she couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be married to him.

  ‘I feel like I’m in so deep – but there’s so much I don’t know or understand,’ she tells Will.

  Will is watching her with concern. ‘Here, let go of the railing and just come with me for a minute,’ he says, holding out his gloved hands.

  Gingerly, she lets go and grasps his fingers, allowing him to pull her into the middle. He holds both her hands, skating backwards easily, occasionally looking over his shoulder to check the way is clear.

  ‘Just bend your knees a little bit, and relax. I’ll pull you. Close your eyes for a second and try to let everything else go.’

>   Eleanor does as he bids, and as she tries to tune everything out she grows ever more aware of the physical connection between them. It feels too much right now, she wants to pull her hands away, but if she does she’ll be on her bottom within seconds.

  Then she hears a little voice next to her. She opens her eyes to see Savannah skating alongside them, hands on her hips, staring at Will. ‘Why are you holding hands with our cousin?’ she demands.

  Eleanor blushes, but Will smiles at them then raises his eyebrows at Eleanor once the girls have skated ahead. ‘Cousins! It’s bizarre that you are related to Susan. You two couldn’t be more different.’

  ‘We’re only related by marriage, but I’ll take that as a compliment.’

  The words are out before she realises, and she reddens, relieved when Will lets out a snort of laughter.

  ‘She’s not just hard to talk to at work, then?’

  ‘No.’ Again she has an urge to tell him more – all about what it’s like to live in a mansion with an ice queen for an aunt, about the argument she heard last night, but her eyes are drawn to her young charges skating along. Savannah is looking up at Naeve, chatting away, while Naeve stares ahead, her expression determined. To say more right now would feel like a betrayal. And she doesn’t really know Will – yet it’s easy to be in his company, holding his hands, letting him pull her along. While she’d like to trust him, she’s learned from past experience that once she confides in someone, and they begin to drag down the walls around her, she is liable to crumble.

  Will is speaking again. ‘Do you want to go back to the side?’

  ‘Yes,’ she says, allowing a wave of disappointment to wash over her.

  As he pulls her towards the edge of the rink, her phone begins to ring in her jacket pocket. Once she has one hand back on the barrier, she grabs it and sees Susan’s name.

  ‘Eleanor,’ Susan says as she answers it, without even waiting for her hello. ‘You need to come home right away – the police are here, and they want to talk to you.’